Jamestown Colonists Were Cannibals

Researchers made a grisly discovery recently while examining the skeleton of a young girl from 1^7th-Century Jamestown:

At least some Jamestown residents resorted to cannibalism.

While the circumstances remain unknown, the girl's skeleton shows signs of butchery. Several accounts from the time describe random acts of cannibalism. One account says a grave was dug up for the meat. However, few researchers are willing to say that some of the Jamestown populace resorted to cannibalism despite the accounts.

This skeleton provides hard evidence that cannot be ignored.

© C Harris Lynn, 2013

Sans Fava Beans

Russian officials say they arrested a man eating "an acquaintance's" liver with a side of potatoes after following a trail of dismemberment across Moscow.

Apparently, the limbs and head of the victim were trailed across the Russian city. Authorities followed the trail to the suspect's home, where he admitted his crime. The suspect was eating his meal at the time of his arrest. Authorities say the rest of the victim's liver was in the refrigerator.

The cause of death has yet to be determined.

© C Harris Lynn, 2011

Rus-ka-bob

Three homeless men with previous criminal records have been arrested in Russia on suspicion of having murdered a man, eaten him, and sold pieces of him to a local kebab house! Police say parts of a body were discovered which lead to the three men's capture. That is when police found out the men had apparently sold some of the body to the local restaurateur. The victim is thought to have been a 25-year old man.

The site does not mention whether or not anyone was actually served human flesh.

© C Harris Lynn, 2009

African Leader Denies Cannibalism

Charles Taylor, the first African leader to ever be tried by an international court, denies allegations of cannibalism. Taylor faces 11 counts of war crimes - including such heinous acts as hacking off victims' limbs and conscripting child soldiers - and several of the soldiers who worked for him have given testimony concerning cannibalism.

One soldier said he ate human flesh with Charles Taylor during the meeting of a secret society, named Poro. Several of his men told the court he had ordered them to eat the flesh of their victims. This was a common practice amongst many barbaric tribes eons ago, which still exists in parts of the DR Congo, New Zealand, and elsewhere today.

Taylor said the allegations were "Total nonsense." He also told reporters, "It is sickening. You must be sick to believe it. It makes you feel like throwing up!" However, he confirmed that there are cannibals in the Sierra Leone area.

Charles Taylor denies all of the charges he is facing.

© C Harris Lynn, 2009

Gay Tactics? Release Your Inner Cannibal!

23-year old Zacharie Morrison plead guilty to aggravated assault in January, regarding an attack he made on then 31-year-old Aaron Helferty in which he bit the man's nose -- hard enough that Helferty has since undergone surgery to repair it.   But that isn't that interesting:

Morrison told the court-appointed psychologist that he became enraged when he saw the older man "grab" a girl on the dancefloor and approached him.  At this point, Morrison says Helferty adopted "gay tactics" by trying to dance with him before grabbing him by the throat.

Morrison said that it was at this point that, "The cannibalist in me came out.  It was really frightening for me."  One can only imagine how it was for Mr. Helferty.  The psychologist also recorded the following statement: "Biting should only be used as a last resort and not as a fight tactic, according to Bruce Lee the martial artist."  This information was entered into evidence in the Canadian court.

While all of this sounds rather bizarre, we have to remember it is being presented completely out of context; were you to record any conversation word for word and present only certain parts of it, it could likewise be perverted.  The psychologist recommended anger management classes and a "career path" for Morrison, but noted he was a "medium risk" for re-offense.

The prosecutor wants to see him serve up to 30 years in prison.

© C Harris Lynn, 2009

Cannibals in American Folklore

According to folklorist, B. A. Botkin, there existed a strain of American folklore in the "Wild West" days concerning braggarts who purported to be cannibals.

The American "Wild West" refers largely to the entire 19^th-Century, but more specifically (and usually) to the latter half of the century, after the Civil War and before the turn of the Century. As America was settled in the East, the West was indisputably "wild" by comparison, and true cowboys and Indians often fought it out across the plains as European descendants expanded westward.

From this era come many legends of violent, debauched men - many of whom were vilified in their day, but have since become heroes of a type. And according to B. A. Botkin, there was a second group of "pseudo-bad" men who boasted of deeds and behavior similar to such legendary men as Wild Bill Hickock, Jesse James, and the like. However, this group of braggarts laid claim to a practice which made them stand apart: "man-eatin'."

Apparently, this claim's origins can be traced back (somewhat) to "savage remarks" such as "I eat men for breakfast" and the stories carry much the same structure, regardless of whom told them:

I live in ____, Texas... whar the human man-eaters come from, and I'm one on 'em. Every person they don't take no fancy to is drug out and scalped alive. My hum range is so plumb full of murder and sin that [H]ell won't be no treat to me.

While the Wild West certainly forced many a man to do things most of us would consider inhuman, and others did these things out of sheer desire or "meanness," Botkin considers these tales to be exactly that and asserts those who told them were invariably drunk at the time.

© C Harris Lynn, 2008

Mexican Cannibal Arrested

A man alleged by police to be a cannibal was arrested in Mexico City.

Jose Luis Calva reportedly told Mexican police he was an aspiring horror novelist and poet who was working on a novel entitled Cannibal Instinct. He also admitted to police that he was a fan of Sir Anthony Hopkins, who portrayed a cannibal in several related horror flicks (though I have absolutely no idea what that has to do with anything - a perfect example of the kind of grasping-at-straws tactics cops love to use in order to bolster their cases).

Circumstantial, anecdotal evidence aside, police claimed to have found a female torso in a cabinet, a leg in the refrigerator, and bones in a cereal box. Calva's girlfriend, a 30-year old mother of two, was reported missing some days back by her family.

Cops are now looking into two other disappearances, including Calva's former girlfriend and a prostitute. Chunks of meat in a frying pan on his stove are being tested to discover if they are human.

Black Jesus Captured

What is up with all the Jesus hoopla lately? First this guy from Miami with the 666 on his arm, telling his devotees to get the same sign tattooed on their bodies, now this "black Jesus." But this cat has apparently been on the run for a few years now, thanks to accusations of sacrificial killings, cannibalism, slavery, and more.

Officials say Steven Tari killed and ate three women he had recruited as sex slaves. He fled from police two years ago and disappeared into the jungles of New Papua. He called himself the "true Christ" and promised his followers great wealth and redemption. He apparently had dozens of sex slaves.

Reports say he was captured by villagers and beaten so badly that he has been unfit to face trial.